“And Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house, that ruled over all that he had, Put, I pray thee, thy hand under my thigh: And I will make thee swear by the LORD, the God of heaven, and the God of the earth, that thou shalt not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell: But thou shalt go unto my country, and to my kindred (family), and take a wife unto (for) my son Isaac.”Genesis 24:2-4
I am not sure when my mom started to pray for a spouse for me, but I know she prayed for quite some time. My mom knew the importance of a godly wife and she was determined to commit it to prayer. There were some girls I dated that she was not too fond of, and looking back, she had good reason to not like to them. I did not have many girlfriends, but dating should lead to marriage, so I can understand her concern.
I tried to be tough when a girl broke up with me, but when I told the story to my mom, my heart melted like butter. She heard my cries and was empathetic to them. I always seemed to omit my role in the break up, but she never asked as I was her “little boy” who was heartbroken. I thank God for a mom who prays and was concerned about who I dated and more so, who I married. She held to the truth as stated in II Corinthians 6:14, “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” It is important who you marry, and it is important who you date.
I “dated” Rebekah when I was 14, and I was determined she was the one for me. We had grand visions and dreams of many kids and a house with a white picket fence. It all sounded good to our young minds, but in less than a year it all vanished before our eyes. I thank God that He brought us back together in His time, and I am grateful for the godly woman Rebekah is. When I was 22, Rebekah came out to see me in Chicago and she even passed the most critical test – the Irene Mendez test. This test, while informal, is a very strict and difficult test. I once asked my mom why she didn’t like one of my girlfriends and she simply said, “A mom just knows.” My mom was the gatekeeper for me, and although I did not always like her advice, I am grateful that she cared enough to tell me the truth. I cannot imagine how different my life would be if I didn’t have a mom who prayed for my spouse. God brought me a spouse who is a true helpmate, and a spouse who faithfully serves alongside of me. Proverbs 18:22 states, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.”
I think of Abraham and how he desired for his son, Isaac, to have a wife from the old country, a place where he knew there was belief in the true God. He did not want Isaac to be carried away with a different teaching from a wife who would be in a position to so easily sway him. Abraham’s last wishes were for a godly bride for his son, and he made his servant promise him this final wish. Praise God for this faithful servant who carried out the wish of his master and thus continued in the promise that God had made to Abraham and his offspring.
Do you think God cares about who you marry? What value do you place on true salvation when it comes to dating? Do you place ultimate value on godliness or is simply listed as a preferred quality? Parents, how about you? Do you pray for your child’s future spouse? Do you monitor who they are dating and take note that this may be someone they marry someday? Does it matter to you whether or not they have a real walk with God, or do you look for the same things the world looks for? Our wicked world needs godly couples who will demonstrate what the love of God looks like. A godly marriage should be a picture of God and His bride, the church. May we be careful in the relationships we keep and may we desire to please God more than we seek our own fleshly and worldly ambitions. If it matters to God, than it should matter to us.