“Then cometh Jesus with them unto a place called Gethsemane, and saith unto the disciples, Sit ye here, while I go and pray yonder (over there). And he took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be sorrowful and very heavy. Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye (stay) here, and watch with me. ”Matthew 26:36-38
It is always good to try to live life as Christ did while He walked on this earth. From time to time, we mimic those who we think are are successful in life and we try to emulate the things they do. This is not a bad thing, but there is one perfect example we can all learn from. Jesus Christ walked this earth and dealt with the same things we do, but yet he never sinned. He felt hunger, thirst, pain, grief and sorrow. He did not walk this earth with a plastic bubble protecting Him from the hard things in life, but He took them head on and dealt with things that were not exactly comfortable for Him. He had feelings like we do and He did not run from them, but He shared and admitted them.
I remember being smitten with Rebekah when I was 14 years old, and I began to tell my dad about her on our way home from school. He looked at me and told me he did not want me falling in love because of the pain that comes with heartbreak. He was telling me tongue in cheek, but I knew there was a sincerity to his words. At the time, it did not make much sense to me as I was head over heels in puppy love. How could there possibly be pain when what I was feeling was very much the opposite? The smile on my face was a reflection of the happiness I had inside of me due to my newfound love. I did not fully understand love at that time, but what I knew about it, I felt it very strongly.
Rebekah was my first real girlfriend and I felt like the love we had would never end. Well, I was wrong on that one as it only took a little over two months to bring it to a crashing end. I was dumped on a volleyball court at family camp, and I felt as though my heart was ripped out of my chest. My dad’s words rang in my ears and my feelings of happiness and love turned into despair and hopelessness. Rebekah was surrounded by her friends as she told me we were breaking up, and I walked into the darkness of the night which clearly represented the feelings I felt. I was trying to be a tough guy and suck up my feelings, but tears ran down my face and I hung my head in sorrow.
I was too proud to admit the hurt I felt. I did my best to suppress those feelings in public, but in private, I cried over the lost relationship. I know now it was a classic case of puppy love gone wrong, but it was a big deal to me at the time. I still have trouble expressing and sharing my feelings, but I am working on not suppressing them and instead being honest and open with them.
As Jesus Christ was facing the cross, He was acutely aware of the agony, pain, and heartbreak He would be facing. His heart was sorrowful and heavy, and He chose to share that with the disciples He called friends. He did not hide his feelings, but He openly confessed them. His soul was sorrowful to the point of death, which is a sorrow I have never experienced. I cannot imagine what He was feeling, but it sounds like He was dealing with extreme pain and sorrow. He was not controlled by His feelings, but He admitted His feelings and was vulnerable to those He was close with.
How are you doing with your feelings? Do you need to talk with your Heavenly Father about them? Do you need to share with a friend? Have you come to know the comfort of described in 1 Peter 5:7, ”Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” May we not carry around burdens we were not meant to carry, but instead, give those to God. He gave us feelings for a reason, but we are not to be controlled by our feelings. We can live like He did and not be ashamed or hesitant to share the feelings He has given us, and always compare them to the truth of His Word.